RESPECT YOUR UNIQUENESS

 Your individuality is a blessing, not a burden. If

you try to be like everyone else, your life will be

no greater than theirs. By following the crowd,

you’ll become a part of it and fail to stand out. By

travelling the same road as them, you won’t get the

chance to see anything different from what they see.

As young children, we’re regularly reminded that we’re all individuals and should have no shame in being ourselves. We’re encouraged to pursue our wildest dreams! But as we get older, our world of possibility shrinks.

People say, ‘Yes, be yourself… but not like that!’ or ‘You can be anything in the world… but this is the right path to take.’ In psychology, the concept of ‘social proof’ suggests that people like to follow the crowd. If everyone else is doing it, you assume it’s the right thing to do. Other people influence your actions more than you realize. For example, if you had to pick between two new bars and you could see that one was packed while the other isn’t, you’d assume that the empty one sucked and the popular one was much better! But just because everyone else is doing it does not mean it’s right. Slavery used to be legal, but now nearly everyone would agree that it’s inhumane, degrading and immoral.

Start to question your actions. Why do you do what you do, and choose what you choose? Are you doing what you really think is right, or are you following the crowd? If you discover your choices are frequently dictated by the views of others, you know you’re relinquishing control over your life. Without control, we panic and end up in low vibrational states, such as anxiety. Ultimately, we end up having no control over how much joy we

experience, as we become slaves to other people’s opinions.

Fear and scarcity are commonly used to control society. I’ve known many people who, instead of living the life they’d have chosen, have lived the life they were told to by others in the form of well-meaning guidance and support. And while some people want what’s best for you, they may not understand what’s best for you. They may also make decisions for you based on fear that’s been passed on to them by someone else.

You can listen to the crowd

or you can listen to your soul

and be on your own stage.

But you shouldn’t feel like you’re living someone else’s beliefs. You shouldn’t feel like you have to meet everyone else’s expectations or live your life a certain way to gain their approval. You shouldn’t feel like you have to shy away from being who you really are, from your uniqueness.

Life shouldn’t feel limiting.

The truth is that, either way, you’re going

to be judged, whether you live life on

your own terms or on other people’s.

Someone once said that a tiger doesn’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep.

The tiger isn’t swayed by judgements from animals whose behaviour is dictated by social conditioning. The sheep constantly seeks validation, changes direction and loses its own identity; therefore, it remains lost and ill fated.

Say the word ‘silk’ 10 times out loud.

Now tell me: what do cows drink?

Did you say ‘milk’?

If you did, you’ve fallen into the trap of a psychological technique called priming. I set you up for a particular answer, even though it’s false. Another example: if I told you a story about how I was lost in the middle of nowhere once and had no idea how to get out, and then told you to complete the word ‘st_ck’, you’d be more likely to say ‘stuck’ instead of ‘stick’.

Priming also provides cues to help the memory without realizing the connection. Imagine if you could set people up to think and act in a certain way, without knowing. This is exactly what marketing companies do all the time to increase sales.

Authenticity is rare these days, and many of our actions are at the suggestion of someone else. Without drawing you into paranoia, we’re easily reprogrammed to satisfy the needs of another human being – or, indeed, of a corporation.

Don’t let your individuality get taken away from you, just so you can fit in with the rest of society. Embrace your uniqueness. Are you considered weird? Awesome! This is only because most people are living inside an imaginary box and you don’t fit in it; and we’re led to believe that when you don’t fit society’s needs, something is wrong with you. Who wants to be bounded by a box that isn’t even there? Not me! Freedom has no constraints.

We can always improve ourselves and grow as individuals. We can step out of our comfort zone and challenge ourselves. But society often makes us feel like we’re wrong for just being ourselves.

They will call you quiet because you’re

perfectly happy in silence.

They will call you weak because you

avoid conflict and drama.

They will call you obsessed for being

passionate about the things you love.

They will call you rude for not

engaging in social pleasantries.

They will call you arrogant for having self-respect.

They will call you boring for not being extrovert.

They will call you wrong for having different beliefs.

They will call you shy when you choose

not to interact in small talk.

They will call you weird because you choose

not to conform to societal trends.

They will call you fake for trying

your best to remain positive.

They will call you a loner because you’re

comfortable being on your own.

They will call you lost for not following

the same route as others.

They will call you a geek for being

a knowledge-seeker.

They will call you ugly for not

looking like celebrities.

They will call you dumb for not being an academic.

They will call you crazy for thinking

differently from others.

They will call you cheap for

knowing value for money.

They will call you disloyal for distancing

yourself from negative people.

Let them call you what they want. You don’t have to play the part they want you to play. Create your own part to play in the world.